Individuals

I''ve posted a few rants on her y''all but I just want to let everyone know that I''m not always piss and vinegar!

My biology teacher at GSC is probably the best thing that has happened to me this semester. I''ve been having some major life drama and she has gone out of her way to accommodate me! I would have given her the extra loaf of sourdough that I had baked at my friends house but since I filled my friends house with smoke I figured she deserved it!
Seriously Dr. Awesome, you don''t know how much of a help you are! I hope you only get amazing fortunes in your cookies. May you live in a world where there are no iron lungs nor umbrellas! May peace and happiness flow freely in your life like the rivers of Georgia 10 years ago! God bless you!

See what happens to you when you are a unarmed black male walking around Hartwell, Ga late at night... by the police!

http://www.thehartwellsun.com/articles/2009/02/19/news/news02.txt

POLICE BASTARD

So, i am still sure it works like this nowadays...
1. you do a job/work/preform a service for said company/person.
2. you get paid.

Why has it been so much trouble for people who own businesses here in athens to do that? and if it is a problem... why are you hiring me?

As I am using a bike machine a strange man approaches. I acknowledge him, nod and continue pedaling on my merry way towards toned and delicious looking legs (let me dream). As I am shuffling between "blow your mind" by Eve and "crash" by Gwen Stefani you decide to ask me a question. Wait, that''s me being a little generous on your part. You yell at my face, "hey, how long u gonna be?" Now, being the civilized person I am, no matter what my heart rate is, I pause my candy-pop universe to let you know that it''s probably going to be at least fifteen more minutes and that there is a bike right next to me that would loved to be used! You look at me like I was muttering in Hebrew and pace the gym until you squat yourself on the quad machine. Now, somewhere you misunderstood my courteous response of , "it''ll be fifteen" for "please stare at me anxiously for the next fifteen minutes because I assume you have nothing better to do or no other muscle groups to exercise today".

Me: instructor at the university
You: the s***tiest student I have ever had. Not only do you never do the homework, never study, and never participate you act like an a** each and every day. You constantly talk about something that nobody wants to know - and I''ve tried to shut you up, but it never works! I know more about your family, career goals, and sordid past than I remember about my own! And I''m actively trying to ignore you!
You skipped class to read a stamp in a foreign language? Who are you and where did you come from? Because NASA needs to send a team to investigate the area.
Your cries for attention are lame and your blatent rudeness (who texts [in class] while holding the phone 3 inches from their face?) and whiny attempts at catching my "mistakes" are so annoying and frequent that I literally had no idea what to do with you. And I''m normally good at intimidation techniques.
And I''m sure you''re not the only quasi-depressed emo-kid who thinks they''re cool by acting all "in-your-face." Here''s a clue: you''re not misunderstood. You''re an annoyingly intelligent little bastard actually, but you''re about as wise as a piece of dog s***. Grow up! And please shut up! To all you emo-teenagers, spare us - we''re adults because we survived all that s*** you''re going through right now and whining about. I hope you (worst student ever) grow up and realize what an a** you are and resolve to change.

My girlfriend just set up her work at Last Resort. If you get the chance, you should stop by and tell me what you think. Thanks!

I say on here what I would not say to your face. Not because I am afraid of you, nor is it because I want to maintain our friendship. Instead, I hope that one day (soon) perhaps you will read this and think to yourself, "Why am I so boring? So lacking in taste? Is this about me?" You poor creature, all you do is sit in front of your machine and play pointless puzzles all day long. "They're not pointless," you retort. Yes, yes they are. Quit chatting on AIM with friends from your high school or people you don't know in real life. Quit downloading useless programs to make your computer "sexy". It's a computer; it will never give you a blow job, and it will never give you a hand job. It may assist but so can one of the opposite sex, and then some. But hey, if you want to do it with a guy, that's your decision, not mine.
You go home every weekend, but you claim every other. Quit letting your parents control every aspect of your life. You're in college; you're (# between 18-21). Either way, the law recognizes you as an adult. Grow up. Man up. Quit letting your parents have you by the scrotum. So you may have screwed up earlier in your college career, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun anymore. Drink a little, party a little, go out and bang an a** or two. What's the point of living if you plan to spend it in your room all day long? You didn't even choose to live with people that you enjoy! Who the hell does that?! You don't have a car, which is fine. That's not your fault. But your parents tease you ever so often about giving you one. Are they going to or not? Ask them!!! WTF! YOU'RE (# between 18-21) AND YOU CAN'T STAND UP TO YOUR PARENTS! You love them? Good, any good son should. But standing up against them isn't dis-loving them! Did you miss your teenage years or something? Have your balls even dropped?!

I realize she is a dog, dear neighbor. I realize dogs bark. But yours barks from sunup to sundown almost everyday of the week. "I work," you say. Fabulous, I work too. "She''s a dog," you reply. I''m aware. But you''re a dog owner and that title means you have a certain responsibility to your dog. When we tried to gently confront you (actually, it was your neighbor who was watching her during your many excursions elsewhere) the instructions given were to "stomp on the floor and yell ''Shut-up, Dog''." That stopped her barking briefly. But then she began to howl. And I think you went away for the week since you didn''t answer your door. That''s when I called animal control. They issued you a warning. You responded to the citation by telling them you no longer owned the dog. I only found out that information after I called animal control the second time to complain about the barking. Now there is the possibility to bring this matter to court. I really don''t want to do that but I need a restful night''s sleep. If I don''t sleep, I get cranky. The only thing that helps me vent my frustration is jump roping while listening to Tracy Lords'' techno album very loudly. IOh yeah- Tracy Lords put out a techno album. It''s pretty much a thumping crap-fest but it sure gets the energy going. Funny- isn''t our workout room right above your bedroom? Even funnier are our thin walls. I never realized how thin they were until I discovered that barking was coming from your apartment. Since I have to be at work an hour away, I have to wake up around 7am or so. That means I''ll have to start my workout around 5am. Tell you what- I''ll be happy to reschedule my workouts. I''ll even rip up the paperwork furthering the barking complaint- those citations can have a hefty fine and no one likes to go to court. All you have to do is be a more responsible dog owner. Pawtropolis has reasonable pet-sitting fees. Not to mention highly recommended obedience schools.

This posting is about a female black lab mix that went missing around 1pm today. She has no tag but a flea collar and silver chain. All black with white feet and a white stripe down her chest. Answers to the name Athena. We love her and miss her dearly. Went missing in Riverbend/millege/college st. Area.

Any info please email alise24@tmail.com

A big thank you to the douche who thought it would be awesome to scribble all over my car tag with a black marker. You''re a f***ing winner.